Fic and Ficlets

[cold_nostalgia]

 

Title: Ernie Mitchell Must Die

Disclaimer: Don’t own them.  Don’t sue

Claim: Harley & Ivy

Universe:  General DCU.  No specific timeline

Word count: 556

Rating: PG-13 for swearing

Prompt: Wicked

Characters:  Harley, Ivy

Summary:  Ivy isn’t as up to speed on popular culture as everybody else is.

“What did he mean?”

 

“Who?” Asked Harley, her eyes never leaving the TV screen.

 

“That piece of manure.  Last night.”  Ivy clarified, having finished the delicate task of re-potting a White Orchid.

 

“Ernie?”  Harley shifted in her seat, “he called us a pair of fucking whores, Red.  I kinda think that speaks for itself.”

 

“No, before that.” Ivy snapped.  “What did he mean when he called us ‘Elphaba and Glinda’?”

 

“Dunno.”  Harley said automatically.

 

Ivy stormed across the room, snatching the remote control from Harley’s hand, hitting the mute button with more force than was necessary.

 

“Yes you do, Harl.  Out with it.”

 

Harley sighed.  “I think they’re characters from a musical,” she extended her hand, “can I get the remote back, please?”

 

“What kind of musical?” Asked Ivy, ignoring her partner completely.

 

Harley sighed again in exasperation , “I don’t know.”

 

Ivy frowned, “how can you not know?  You just said they were from a musical.  How can you not know which one?”

 

“I said ‘I think’.”  Harley shrugged, “I’ve heard the names before, but I wasn’t sure where I did heard them from – it was a guess.”

 

Ivy stared at her for a moment.  “You’re lying.”

 

“What!” Harley yelped, practically jumping out of her seat.  “Why would I do something like that?”

 

“So you can shut me up,” Ivy spat knowingly.  “So that you can get back to liquidifying your brain in peace.” 

 

Harley pinched the bridge of her nose, “you know me better than that, Red.”

 

“Do I?” Ivy asked sullenly.  “God forbid anything come between you and your beloved television.  It’s almost as bad as you and your pathetic obsession with that clown.”

 

Harley closed her eyes and counted to ten.  “Why is it so important?  The slime ball called us a couple of names; he’s going down when we catch up to him.  Who cares?”

 

 

“Because I don’t know what it means!” Ivy exploded.  She began to pace the room agitatedly, “it’s not the first time we’ve been called that – remember Robin used that reference a couple of months ago – I don’t like not knowing what the joke is.”

 

“Well it can’t be any worse than being called a couple of whores.”  Harley muttered.

 

“How do you know?”  Ivy enquired, her face now inches from Harley’s.

 

“A potty-mouthed Robin?  I dunno, Red.”

 

Ivy continued to drill holes through Harley’s skull.

 

“Look,” Harley began, “why don’t you just check the Internet.  You’ll probably find the answer there, just google them.”

 

“Google? What’s google?”

 

“Google’s a search engine,” Harley clarified.  “Just type Elphaba and Glinda into the search engine, hit the—.”

 

“Yes Harley!” Ivy interrupted impatiently, “ I am perfectly capable of surfing the Internet myself, you know.”  She shot another icy glare at her friend, “so you don’t know then?”

 

“No, Red.” Harley lied smoothly, “if I did, I’d tell ya.”

 

Ivy glowered at her for a few more seconds, before throwing the remote control to the far corner of the room and storming out in disgust.

 

Harley immediately pounced on the object, silently praying that she hadn’t missed an important part of her show.  Her hope that she would be able to watch the rest of her favourite TV show uninterrupted was completely destroyed, however, when a voice originating from the other room screeched out:

 

“I’M SUPPOSED TO BE WHO?!”

Title:  Speed

Disclaimer: Don’t own them.  Don’t sue.

Claim:  Harley & Ivy

Word count: 134

Universe: DCU

Rating: PG

Prompt: 41. Abba

Characters: Harley, Ivy

Summary:  Ivy isn’t enthralled with Harley’s choice in music.

 

Ivy didn’t mind Harley putting on some music when they occasionally ended up getting chased by squad cars or even the Batmobile its self.  In fact, although she would never admit to it - even under pain of death - there were times when she rather enjoyed it.

 

There was something exhilarating about it.  The wind in their hair, the slight smell of gunpowder in the air, as they flew down the street; their laughter being drowned out by the wail of sirens, the CD player pumping out Steppenwolf - or something along those lines…

 

It got the blood pumping.  It made the adrenaline scream…

 

What Ivy did object to was being involved in a high-speed car chase, with musical accompaniment by ABBA.  More specifically Mama Mia…it just felt wrong to her ears somehow.

Title: Choice

Disclaimer:  Don’t own them.  Don’t sue.

Universe:  General DCU, slightly a/u

Word Count:  115

Rating: PG

Prompt: 42. Traitor

Characters: Most of the People in DCU

Summary: It was do or die.

She wasn’t here because of any love she had for her allies in the Injustice League.  There was change in the air; a dawn of a new era would begin after all this was over. 

 

It was do or die.  There would be no second chances after the battle to-end-all-battles was over, where the losers would be consigned to the dumpbin of history and the winners would carve out a brave new world.

 

Ivy had no intention of being on the losing side.

 

So it was only with a brief hesitation that when she spotted her only human friend tussling with Rag Doll on the battlefield, she aimed her gun at Harley’s head and fired.